Into Snape's Pensieve: A sad memory
by Phiction Phantom
Summary: One Shot HBP Spoilers...Harry falls into another of Snape's memories and learns more about the professor. Don't read if you haven't read book 6 yet! Also, Sirius especially seems a bit evil in my stories, I can't help it, I think he is evil.


Title: This doesn't have a title, and is part of a larger work

Background: This is one of many pensieve trips Harry takes into Snape's memories. This is before 'Snape's Worst Memory', but not much before (early 5th year). The premise is, of course that he is very infatuated with Lily Evans, and just a general look into his psyche. However, it is from Harry's Point of View...unfortunately. and PS. I see teen Snape as being much more sensitive than adult Snape...you know before he became bitter.

Disclaimer: I don't own these characters, but I do own 2 of the spells in this chapter :-)

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Harry landed in the memory, and had the immediate feeling of claustrophobia.

Harry looked around, to get his bearings. They appeared to be in a very small room, or a large closet. The place was dimly lit but he could see that the walls were wooden with no adornments. On the side and back walls there were a few dusty shelves with bottles and old cauldrons on them.

His eyes traveled down the shelves looking at relics that had obviously not been touched for ages. Near the stone floor stood a small, dilapidated table, no taller than a footstool. It was pushed into the corner, to the right of the door. Resting on the table stood a bubbling cauldron, an advanced potions book, and scraps of parchment, covered in tiny handwriting and drawings. Ingredients were lined up in neat rows, to the right of the cauldron. Two small candles burned lazily at either end of the table shedding enough light to illuminate Snape's face only when he leaned in to scribble something down, which he was doing now.

Harry watched as Snape, kneeling on the floor, carefully scrawled down notes into his already marked up potions book. He paused, sat back and was lost in shadows for a moment, but went back to reread his notes. Harry watched as Snape went about his business. He was working very purposefully, with few pauses. Turning between annotating and adding ingredients meticulously, almost lovingly, as he muttered to himself quietly in an almost singsong way.

Harry tried to get closer to glance over Snape's shoulder and see what he was writing, but Snape was working so close to the page that it was impossible. The small room was rather warm, and Snape was continually wiping his brow, and brushing his raven hair back off his face, out of his way, and behind his ears.

A not unpleasant odor wafted up from the cauldron and Harry's eyes were drawn away from Snape to the potion. Something about it seemed familiar, thought he had not remembered ever making a potion like this. It didn't take long to hit him what it was however, for he had seen this potion before, though what he remembered was the scent.

Snape had just begun stirring the potion with a wooden ladle when muffled voices broke his concentration. His head shot up and he froze, inclining his head to the door. He blew out his candles quickly, and sat breathlessly, listening intently.

Harry was blind without the candles, and could only hear the nervous movements of Snape, as he quietly moved some of his papers.

The voices outside got louder, and Harry could just barely make out what they were saying. It sounded like the voices of students, rather than teachers, and they were arguing about something. One of the voices laughed abruptly and loudly, and he heard others shush the laugher. The hushed voices started up their discussion again, and trailed off.

Snape let out a long draft of breath, obviously relieved. A few moments later Harry heard Snape whisper "Incendio" and the candle blinked back to life. He did the same with the other then placed his wand under the table distractedly, and eagerly went back to the potion.

Snape had just returned to stirring when there was a loud bang, and the door shuddered. Harry took a step back startled, as Snape glanced quickly between the door and potion, trying to figure out what to do next.

Before Snape made another move, someone unseen opened the door. Looking as if he wanted to hide, he stared squinting into the gloom beyond t1Harry landed in the memory, and had the immediate feeling of claustrophobia.

Harry looked around, to get his bearings. They appeared to be in a very small room, or a large closet. The place was dimly lit but he could see that the walls were wooden with no adornments. On the side and back walls there were a few dusty shelves with bottles and old cauldrons on them.

His eyes traveled down the shelves looking at relics that had obviously not been touched for ages. Near the stone floor stood a small, dilapidated table, no taller than a footstool. It was pushed into the corner, to the right of the door. Resting on the table stood a bubbling cauldron, an advanced potions book, and scraps of parchment, covered in tiny handwriting and drawings. Ingredients were lined up in neat rows, to the right of the cauldron. Two small candles burned lazily at either end of the table shedding enough light to illuminate Snape's face only when he leaned in to scribble something down, which he was doing now.

Harry watched as Snape, kneeling on the floor, carefully scrawled down notes into his already marked up potions book. He paused, sat back and was lost in shadows for a moment, but went back to reread his notes. Harry watched as Snape went about his business. He was working very purposefully, with few pauses. Turning between annotating and adding ingredients meticulously, almost lovingly, as he muttered to himself quietly in an almost singsong way.

Harry tried to get closer to glance over Snape's shoulder and see what he was writing, but Snape was working so close to the page that it was impossible. The small room was rather warm, and Snape was continually wiping his brow, and brushing his raven hair back off his face, out of his way, and behind his ears.

A not unpleasant odor wafted up from the cauldron and Harry's eyes were drawn away from Snape to the potion. Something about it seemed familiar, thought he had not remembered ever making a potion like this. It didn't take long to hit him what it was however, for he had seen this potion before, though what he remembered was the scent.

Snape had just begun stirring the potion with a wooden ladle when muffled voices broke his concentration. His head shot up and he froze, inclining his head to the door. He blew out his candles quickly, and sat breathlessly, listening intently.

Harry was blind without the candles, and could only hear the nervous movements of Snape, as he quietly moved some of his papers.

The voices outside got louder, and Harry could just barely make out what they were saying. It sounded like the voices of students, rather than teachers, and they were arguing about something. One of the voices laughed abruptly and loudly, and he heard others shush the laugher. The hushed voices started up their discussion again, and trailed off.

Snape let out a long draft of breath, obviously relieved. A few moments later Harry heard Snape whisper "Incendio" and the candle blinked back to life. He did the same with the other then placed his wand under the table distractedly, and eagerly went back to the potion.

Snape had just returned to stirring when there was a loud bang, and the door shuddered. Harry took a step back startled, as Snape glanced quickly between the door and potion, trying to figure out what to do next.

Before Snape made another move, someone unseen opened the door. Looking as if he wanted to hide, he stared squinting into the gloom beyond the door, trying to figure out who was standing there.

"Lumos," Harry heard from the hallway, and the face of Sirius Black appeared out of the murk.

"Snivellus," drawled Sirius, eyeing Snape suspiciously, "What are you doing here?"

Snape remained silent, tensed. He brought his hands up peculiarly and brought his hair from behind his ears so that it fell limply over most of his face.

"What are you up to?" a voice chimed in, and the face of James Potter leaned into the light.

Harry's heart leapt cat the sight of his father, but Harry remembered his last delve into Snape's memory, and his stomach gave a familiar lurch. He believed Snape who would become a murderer and death eater deserved anything he got, but he felt a shame that his father and godfather would act so, well, so like Malfoy, Crabbe, and Goyle treated him in his first few years.

"I should ask you the same thing," Snape said quietly, interrupting Harry's thoughts.

A high-pitched whine came from the dark hall, "We were just-"

"Shut it, Peter!" James said tersely. "Don't tell him. Lumos." And two wands were lit. The darkness of the closet further retreated. Snape leaned back into the cushions of shadows.

"What's this?" Sirius asked motioning to the cauldron filled with iridescent potion.

Snape darkened and Harry noticed that his cheeks, normally pallid, turned a light pink. "None of your business." He snarled.

"It's our business if we say so," Sirius said haughtily, "Shall I fetch Lupin? He's a prefect you know. Perhaps you'd enjoy explaining this to him."

"What do you want?" Snape hissed.

"I just want to know what you're cooking up," Sirius said flatly, "You know, just between friends."

"Dabbling in the dark arts I would assume," James asserted.

"Maybe you are working up a potion to wash your hair," Sirius quipped with a laugh.

Fury flashed in Snape's dark eyes, but he remained still.

"Oh, did I offend you?" Sirius feigned concern, "I'm sorry, I forgot that you don't wash your hair."

James and Peter sniggered derisively. Sirius turned to whisper something to James, which was just the opening Snape was looking for. He reached inside his robes for his wand and a look of horror struck his face when he realized it wasn't there. Harry watched him feel around frantically on the floor.

James said, "Stupefy" and Snape was thrown back into a sitting position.

"Now, now, Snapey," James said mockingly, "No need to do something you'll regret. Play nice."

James and Sirius were both pointing their wands at Snape now. Sirius said, "What dark magic are you playing at?"

"It's…not…dark…magic…" Snape said between gritted teeth. Though he would say no more. James and Sirius exchanged glances.

"Maybe we should have you taste it the," James suggested.

Sirius took a step into the closet and picked up the wooden ladle from the cauldron. "Right then, drink up Snivelly" Sirius said holding out the spoon with the concoction still boiling and sending up plumes of spiraling steam.

Snape's eyes grew wide and he crawled further back into the dark corner.

"Look he's afraid," James laughed. "It must be dangerous."

"I'm not afraid, Potter!" Snape growled viciously.

Harry jumped, for a moment forgetting that Snape was talking to another Potter, his father. He glanced nervously back at Sirius who was making a clucking sound with his tongue.

"Take your medicine," Sirius said.

Snape's hand shot up very suddenly and knocked the spoon from Sirius's hand, spilling much of it on this robes and arms.

"Dammit Snape!" Sirius raged and quickly grabbed Snape's throat and pushed him against the wall. "That burned!"

Sirius outweighed and out muscled Snape's scrawny form. Snape was choking, and fighting for breath. Sirius pushed him harder against the wall, and all Snape could do was clutch at his hands.

James put a hand on Sirius's shoulder, "Easy, Sirius!" he said concerned.

Sirius relaxed his grip and stepped back, keeping his wand pointed at Snape. Snape gasped in a long breath. He looked back up at the group with unwavering hatred. His eyes were watering from pain.

"Certainly no?" Sirius bellowed, "Certainly you aren't crying." Peter and James sniggered.

Snape said nothing, but looked away from them ashamedly.

"What's this then?" Sirius asked, noticing the handwritten notes on the parchment. Snape lunged for the papers but he was too late. James skillfully flicked his want, "Avolo Abohorreo"

Harry watched in horror as Snape flew against the wall, his head making a sickening thud, and then falling back down. Only the thought of the murderer he knew this man to become stopped Harry from feeling the pity that was trying to creep in. He was ashamed of Sirius, of his father. How could they be this cruel? He stood in stunned silence watching.

James picked up Snape's notes and textbook and glanced surreptitiously at it. "Take a look," he said showing Sirius. The third student who Harry knew to be Peter Pettigrew leaned in to see.

"A love potion!" Pettigrew exclaimed in shrill delight.

Harry looked to Snape who was still rubbing the back of his head from the blow. His head was bowed, but Harry could see that his face was burning now, "Give that to me!" he seethed.

"It's rude to interrupt people when they're reading," snapped Sirius.

"Snape's face contoured into a horrible sneer of hatred as he slowly inched toward his wand.

Harry saw his dad raise his wand warningly at Snape, and he froze.

"Well, well," Sirius said finally, "a love potion Snapey? Who's the lucky girl?"

"Shut up," Snape spat, his eyes darting around nervously. He regained his composure quickly, and added, "It's extra credit, but of course you would know that if you had as many brains as you have insufferable wit."

Sirius glowered, "You know you're really lucky that-"

You're really lucky," Snape interrupted, "That I don't have my wand."

"What would you do? Hit me with it. You're one of the most unapt wizards I've ever met." Sirius chided, and motioned to the papers now all over the floor, "I mean. What is this? Levicorpus? That's so cute, are you trying to make up spells?"

"And do you really expect us to believe that line about extra credit?" James mused, "Everyone knows that making love potions is banned."

"But that just leaves one question," Sirius said coolly, "Who would want to love you, with or without a potion?"

Sirius, James and Peter all had a laugh at that, and then Sirius added, "I bet your mother doesn't even love an ugly git like you."

At that, Snape burst up and forward at Sirius, who got as much as, "Expeli-" before he was knocked off his feet wand falling out of his hand. Sirius and Snape both tumbled to the ground, and the wind was knocked out of Sirius who lay there wheezing.

Harry wouldn't have believe the diminutive Severus Snape could have moved the more formidable Sirius Black, but sheer anger and the element of surprise were on his side. Now, still moving quickly, Snape rolled over to a kneeling position and picked up Sirius's wand.

Harry watched Snape hastily raise the wand, and a moment later his father was flying down the hall. Peter started running away, but he was hit with a curse and fell on his face. Sirius was regaining his bearings, but had only barely lifted his head off the ground when Snape turned the wand on its owner.

"Give me one reason…" Snape hissed quietly, "That I shouldn't…. shouldn't…hurt you."

Sirius's eyes widened, then narrowed to slits, "You don't have the-"

"TRY ME!" Snape shouted, not caring who heard anymore.

"I know _who_ she is," Sirius said almost inaudibly.

Snape wavered. His wand hand dropped a few inches, and he ran his other hand through his hair nervously. He looked stunned, unsure of himself, his voice lost all of it's edge, "What?" He stood utterly taken aback, a face Harry had never seen on Snape before.

"Oh, yes, I _do_ know, do not be mistaken," Sirius admonished quietly, "I've seen you staring at her in potions. Pathetic."

Snape looked stunned, his hand shook slightly, and he struggled to remain calm.

"How would you like me to tell James? How would you like me to tell everyone? That would be good for a laugh," Sirius said hotly.

Snape didn't blink, and suddenly Sirius was hanging upside down by his ankles, cursing wildly.

Snape flicked his wrist and Sirius fell to the floor. Snape, hardened his face again and said, "And that's Levicorpus. It is rather…cute."

Harry watched as his dad lifted his head about 40 feet down the corridor, but Snape couldn't see him because he was facing Sirius. "Expelliarmus!" James roared, and Snape lost Sirius's wand.

Sirius crawled over to his wand and picked it up, saying, "Petrificus Totalus" and with that Snape went rigid and fell on the floor.

James pulled a paper out of his pocket and glanced at it. Harry couldn't see well from where he was standing, but guessed that it was the Marauder's Map. "Filch's coming, hurry!" James said in a loud whisper, and he moved briskly the opposite way down the hall. Peter followed him at a run.

Sirius got up, looking at Snape with unsheltered loathing. He bent down low, looked into Snape's unblinking eyes and said, "And mind you stay away from her. She doesn't like ugly, greasy, slimy, pathetic wizards like you. She's only nice to you, because she pities you."

And with a flick of the wrist, he said "Frango fracta" and the cauldron exploded. Sirius ran down the hall to catch up with his friends, leaving Snape immobile and lifeless.

A moment later the curse wore off. Snape wiped his eyes on the sleeve of his robe and went back into the potions closet, looking around miserably. As he was futilely trying to clean potion and shards of cauldron off of all his tattered belongings the scene faded to black and Harry was propelled out of the pensieve.


End file.
